Going away soon..

Im going away soon...

Im a bit sad, Im happy and sad at the same time. Im going away for a free trip but for 2 weeks or a month. But im sad to leave my family and my lovely bf. They are sending me off to airport tomorrow, all of them, Im so "Gan tong". They said they love me.. & i never leave them for so long, so they have to support me and don't let ppl bully me. I love them too. I love him too. Recently, being away from him, make me loves him more. But at the same time, i need time to evaluate him too. Hmm..I can't accept him being with his friends all the time, but he told me the reasons yesterday, i can accept only half of it. The other half, is spending time with friends also means spending money. But what the hack, im not here right now, and what he will be doing at home other than playing games... so, perhaps, could this change, when He got a house already? Im still studying.

Sorry...

Yesterday was the biggest argument i ever had.

Breakfast
Didn't talk
Didn't inform him anything, merely talked
He stormed off
Don't accept his appology
Talking in the car, argument
Stopped at LRT, walked down from the car
Came back again
Ask, what do i Want ?
I argue and said...
Reached Puchong, cried badly in the car
I felt nothing coz "very Ba" and dissapointed
Then, went back to his house, talked over it and he cried again.
Ask me to give him another chance
No
Explain to me why?

Lie no 1. : Friends ask to play Mah jong, But not playing, wathing Tv with some of them.
Explain : Went there to join them though tired but at least nearer
Lie no 2. : Eating at 5pm, and movie and night, Actually, Movie at 5pm, eating at 8pm.
Explain: He doesn't know the real plan till they have reach
Lie no 3. : Going back to sleep, too tired. Ask me to sleep, But went to friends house
Explain : He is sorry, he lied
Lie no 4. : Will come to me house and stay overnight, but actually went to friends house to play Mahjong
Explain : He is sorry he lied, coz he don't want me to get angry if he told me he went to his friends house
Lie no 5. : Miss me so much, but didn't come and see me tonight, go to friends house and play
Explain : He really miss me a lot, but since its so late already, might as well come early the next morning to see me
Lie no 6. : Told me 5 times he is sleeping
Explain : Its a lie
Lie no 7. : Scared i ll be mad, could be excepteable, but pls dont tell me that you really mis me that much next time, if ur going to friends house to play mah jong
Explain : Really miss me very much,
Lie no 8. : Said I m oversea, so he got nothing to do sometimes, play games lo..
Explain : What to do...nothing to do at home, no tv
Lie no 9. :Im actually a Priority No 2. compare to friends, haven't seen him for nearly 1 month, althought seen him like 3 times for tis month.
Explain : I am always his Priority No 1. Im his motivator, no one can compare. But he went to his friends house most of the time, because they are lke his brothers as he doesn't have anyone to talk to. He said he need my love to support him. And his friends's advise and help him with his work and family problem, coz sometimes I can't understand his work. He doesn't want to talk to me about it, coz i always think its not really that hard, and it can be solve. But he came to me for emotion support.

I said:
1. I don't care if you didn't support me in financial, but at least support me when I needed you.
But you went to P and said already arrange earlier, can't reject, *ok, i accept due to their work schedule*
2. I don't need a husband like you, why is your title is Mr Late? as in expected.. If my son need you to fetch, but daddy is late. I will be sad. Or if my son need his dad to attend his birthday party, because of some appointments with friends, you can't come, i don't want you to dissapoint my child.
3. i don't want to be in the status of being "ba" or yeah, he is like that. Why do I need to experience jsut like what your family is going through with you, they are Ba.. with your attitude. I really pity them, but sorry I don't want to be "ba" with my husband. Statement , Mr XXX is a great guy. Not Mr XXX is late as usual.
4. I don't mind about your financial state right now, but at least pls organized yourself more..If you are looking for someone that can help you to support your family, I am not the one.. I have my family to support too.
5. If you are looking for some one that doesn't mind you going out all the time, PLS go and look for a clubbing girl, not me. EvenI got married to you, if these things happen, I wont' accept it at all, I will run away from you forever.
6. I am not suitable for you, Im not the right kind of girl for you. And to be honest, you are not the right husband for me too.
7. If you are really in a stress situation, I have told him to take it step by step, and no one can achieve the mountain in a day.
8. Very dissapointed, no feeling
9. The house haven't repair yet, why..... He said he will move soon. Just need some time

Conclusion:
Give him time till March 2007 to clear his debts and settle his house problem. If these things not solve, means he didn't organize his things properly, and still keep on being like that. It will be over for us. I hope god will show me his way...

Cheated

Today, Aug 25th, he cheated me again..
I have just came back from a long trip, he came and fetched me from perhentian Serdang, of course i'm very very happy that he is on time, I met him and surprised him, its a wonderful feeling. Been waiting for so long to meet him, was feeling so excited.

Went to lunch with him, with Eu & Le, had lunch at SS2, after that, he fetched me home. Promised that he will be coming tonight, but he didn't. He went out at 4.30pm, coz his friends called him to go for a gathering, then my family and I went for a buffet dinner at 7pm. We finished our dinner at 10pm, reached hom at 11pm, but i called him, ask if he is coming, he said no, he is very tired, need to go back home to rest. So, at 12.15am, I gave him a call again, asked if he was home, he said yes, he said very sleepy, asked me why.. i said no, just want to know if u have reached home. I heard that there's some backgroun noises, I asked him who is it ? so noisy..He said he don't know, just some friends. Ok then..we hung up the phone and he slept. Then, I had a conversation with S3 about some relationship problem, she told me about the things happening with S2, well, I just listened, and wonder could it be that bad, not trusting a guy, and girls having the rights to know where he is all the time..Well, we both know well about my current relationship. Thus, i gave a call to P again at 12.30, checked if he is at home, well he isnt. So, I called him, still the same, sleeping, but voice doesn't sound like sleeping, sounds like he haven't sleep pretending to be sleeping. I asked him 4 times, where he is , finally he said, he is at their house, playing Mahjong. I became so dissapointed, knowing that, and well, its a good thing that I know, an early indication, I don't wish to cont being like this..
Lie no 1. : Friends ask to play Mah jong, But not playing, wathing Tv with some of them.
Lie no 2. : Eating at 5pm, and movie and night, Actually, Movie at 5pm, eating at 8pm.
Lie no 3. : Going back to sleep, too tired. Ask me to sleep, But went to friends house
Lie no 4. : Will come to me house and stay overnight, but actually went to friends house to play Mahjong
Lie no 5. : Miss me so much, but didn't come and see me tonight, go to friends house and play
Lie no 6. : Told me 5 times he is sleeping
Lie no 7. : Scared i ll be mad, could be excepteable, but pls dont tell me that you really mis me that much next time, if ur going to friends house to play mah jong
Lie no 8. : Said I m oversea, so he got nothing to do sometimes, play games lo..
Lie no 9. :Im actually a Priority No 2. compare to friends, haven't seen him for nearly 1 month, althought seen him like 3 times for tis month.

Conclusion: I told him , since like this, if i get married to you, if this kind of thing happen again, I will run away from you forever. Im so dissapointed knowing all this, and you rather tell me lies than telling me the truth. If im your priority no.1, what do you mean you are sleepy and going to your friends house to play mahjong. Do that make sense? I can't see it.......Idiot, Im going to scold you one day and throw you with things, better wait, i will get myself prepare.